Likable Statuses

I have been asked by many friends what my secret is to likable facebook statuses. If you weren't aware, I have an extraordinary gift... I am here today to tell my secret.

Step one: Choose a status topic that people like. Examples include sports, alcoholic beverages, mentioning the truth in a awesome and original way, making an absurd statement.

Step two: The key to a likeable status is enthusiasm and cockiness combined into a single package.

Step three: Timing is everything. You can't post something past 12am and expect people to be lying around on facebook to like your status. The key times are 8am-10am, 1:30pm-5pm and 830pm-1130pm. If you miss your window, you will have to wait to deliver your crazy awesome status.

Step Four: Appeal to your male friends... they are more likely to like your statuses.

Examples of awesome "likeable statuses"

4/13/10
Ravi Patel became a fan of a porn star... it is awesome!
(4 likes, 4 comments)

4/13/10
Ravi Patel is drinking a brew.
(8 likes, 4 comments)

4/8/10
Ravi Patel likes asain chicks.
(5 likes, 3 comments)

4/8/10
Ravi Patel being an asshole is part of my manly essence.
(4 likes, 7 comments)

4/7/10
Ravi Patel and Chris Reese go together like cocaine and waffles.
(5 likes, 5 comments)

4/3/10
Ravi Patel likes his awesome beard.
(4 likes, 8 comments)

4/2/10
Ravi Patel cashes checks and breaks necks.
(3 likes)